Sunday, September 22, 2019

Learn to speak Labour

I've been watching the Labour conference news coverage and have noted a number of key statements that are consistently repeated by those attending. Since they are all in Labour speak, I have helpfully translated them into English. Below are the top 10 statements, along with their translations:

  • Key aid quits to spend more time with his family – key aid quits over lack of competence and decency in Corbyn’s team
  • Labour are a leave party – people are leaving to join the Lib Dems
  • Labour are doing well – Corbyn has record minus 60% approval rating
  • We are for the many, not the few – we alienate many people and get few votes
  • We have a candidate for Prime Minister – Hilary Benn
  • Sitting on the fence worked for Harold Wilson – we love the 1970s
  • Labour are leading the country – this fence is comfortable
  • Labour are bringing together Leavers and Remainers – they are uniting to abandon Labour
  • We demand a general election – we are terrified of an election
  • We hate Tom Watson and want to scrap his job - we hate Tom Watson and want to scrap his job

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